As established by now, my flatmate is a mucky pup. If there's anything I despise, it's mouse poo. When I first arrived, there was tonnes of it, everywhere. I then cleaned, then there was none. The trick is to keep food (and all traces of it- crumbs etc) away hence my near-OCD obsession with keeping the kitchen clean and not eating in my bedroom.
Anyway. This morning. Have a peice of toast for breakfast, search in fridge for spread, find a pot, open it.. am about to plunge knife into lardy depths but, what's this? Crumbs in the spread? I look closer.. pawprints in the spread?? PAWprints???? all is not as it seems, either mice have learnt how to open the fridge and the flora and shit all over it or someone left it out and open. I'd like to think these mice aren't supermausical.
Next. I'd made a rather yummy version of a lime/coriander/honey recipe an ex and I formulated and it involves rice. The leftover rice i'd put in a tupperware. I've just eaten said rice and subsequent discovery of a suspiciously mouse-poo shaped grain has made my stomach re-think this decision. How the hell does mouse shit get inside tupperware, inside the fridge?!?!?!?!
I'm officially living in hell. And no longer eating in this flat.
On a more interesting note. I've applied for a job as a cartoon artist. My first request was to draw children climbing trees, then dogs chasing a squirrel..
I feel sick now.. that was definitely mouse shit risotto. Maybe I'll go and throw up in his bed. He might understand that sort of language.
